friends & credits -
The Open Nest. TACT Care. N:gaged Limited. Come Coach With Me. Network Rail. Adoption Social. London Major Programmes Apprentice. Adoption UK/Adoption Today Blog - Life Beyond Trauma. MumsTrusted. Secondary Schools - Be The Best You Workshops.
LIFE COACH. adoptee. writer. Speaker. charity trustee. Mother. go getter.
As far as Fran was aware, her story was a straightforward one. Fran was ‘unable to be cared for as a baby’ and went into foster care, as did her older sibling. Back in the late seventies, the care system didn’t try to keep siblings together, and they were placed in separate foster homes. Fran was a couple of years later adopted.
Fran grew up seemingly content until she accidentally found a series of front page newspapers during her teenage years. What she found was inconceivable.
Fran discovered not only did uncared for mean abused, but that her sibling had been returned to the place they were removed from and several years on from that time, murdered.
With the support that followed, Fran felt like she was led to believe that if she found some answers, she would no longer have any questions. She could wrap everything up neatly, and carry on. So Fran searched. But going back opened up many more questions, added more layers of trauma and put Fran in a place of re-traumatisation, making the effects of trauma even worse.
What eventually changed Frans' life as an adult, was learning at that time, that it was only the effects of trauma she only had control over. The more able Fran became of accepting and understanding the effects in her everyday life, the stronger she became. Though the stronger Fran became, the more she started to realise that her life wasn’t her own and subsequently came to understand the impact of coercive control.
By sharing some of her stories and working with others, Fran wishes to give those the hope and courage they need to live their life in the best way they can.